Max

You're just fat!

I like food too, but I don't hang my identity on the hook of invented adjectives in a dull effort to wheedle myself out of the mainstream into an elitist class of upper-crust fatties.

I suppose it's for the best: whenever I hear someone earnestly describe herself as a "foodie" or a "slow-food"-er (or any other number of categorical identities) I can know he is a horrible person quick to lick up syndicated aesthetics and pack them away in neat little packages to signify a more meaningful life and aesthetic than a human simulacrum could ever devise.